The Null Device


LiveJournal of the day: HP LaserJet model 1150:

I have decided to take some "Postscript as a second language" courses at the local community college.
I think my inability to speak anything but PCL is hindering my career.

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In the tradition of the "Starbucks: Make a New Friend" mashup:

(via bOING bOING)

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Some handy Aramaic phrases for those going to see Mel Gibson's answer to Battlefield Earth the Greatest Blockbuster Ever Sold. Includes ones like "Sorry I'm late. Have I missed any scourging?", "Yes, I'm Jewish, but I wasn't there that day", and "it sort of reminds me of Life of Brian, but it's nowhere near as funny". (via bOING bOING)

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Some hints for those wishing to compose polyphonic ringtones that work with Nokia phones:

  • Get this PDF file; it describes, among other things, which instrument sounds are available and which ones are mapped to other things. So if your harpsichord ends up sounding like a grand piano, you'll know why.
  • A General MIDI sound module doesn't sound like a Nokia phone, though it's close enough for testing (especially if you keep in mind what's mapped to what). The godawful Universal Sound Module softsynth that comes with Cubase is useful enough for this task.
  • If your tone won't play on your phone, it's probably too large; try cutting it down a bit. I think the limit (for the Nokia 3200, at least) is somewhere betwen 8 and 15K.
  • Remember: it's a ringtone. Get rid of any intros, elaborate filigrees and buildups and get to the meat of it. It's probably going to play only for a few seconds (unless you're the kind of wanker who lets their phone ring out so that everybody on the train can hear how k3wl your tone is, of course, in which case you should probably be garrotted).

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I just found the following in my mailbox:

Subject: Email account utilization warning.

Dear user of,

Our main mailing server will be temporary unavaible for next two days, to continue receiving mail in these days you have to configure our free auto-forwarding service.

For more information see the attached file.

Have a good day,
The team

Given that I own (and that no address such as "" actually exists), I must say I was a touch suspicious. And then I looked at the attachment portion of the email:

Content-Type: application/octet-stream; name="Information.pif" Content-Transfer-Encoding: base64 Content-Disposition: attachment; filename="Information.pif"

Which looks to be a Windows executable of some sort. That's undoubtedly the "free auto-forwarding service" they mentioned. I'm sure it would have done exactly as that, only with the proviso of forwarding penis-pill spam to millions of mailboxes worldwide through my machine.

That is, if I (a) used a Windows machine, and (b) was sufficiently clueless to open an attachment from somebody claiming to be in charge of the "main mailing server" on my domain.

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