The Null Device

Pinkness and horror: What's the front page news in today's mX (that's the free street murdoch in Melbourne)? Well, it's all about McDonalds' exciting and "healthy" new menu. Front page news indeed.

And the new menu is "healthy". The meat has probably still been mechanically recovered from some poor steroid-pumped beast from a feedlot and the vegetable products are probably still Monsanto's Finest, but now it's "healthy". That's right, youth of today: you now have permission to no longer feel bad about eating at McDonalds.

Apropos of which, some rumours I heard about what goes into the food:

• The "hot apple pies" contain no apples, but instead contain chokos (a tasteless vegetable) stewed in apple sauce. Because it's cheaper.
• The "soft serves" and "thick shakes" are not made of milk but rather of vanilla-flavoured lard or something similar. The consistency is the same and it's a lot cheaper. Which is why they don't call them milk shakes, ice cream or the like.

No idea whether those are true or merely urban legends (like the one about earthworms in burgers), but I've heard them from multiple sources.

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