The Null Device

Everyone loves a girl who... Unwitting celebrity fellatrix Claire Swire, who got her less-than-flattering 15 minutes when her boyfriend Bradley Chait forwarded an explicit mail from her, now has a lot of fans, all of them unwanted; her flat in London has been bombarded with sexually explicit postcards and phone calls from horny males (including a British Army officer in Kosovo, via satellite phone); meanwhile, one fan has set up a web site dedicated to Ms. Swire, and "to swire" has become current slang for the act of performing a particularly enthusiastic Lewinsky. Ouch; she should probably look at changing her name after this. No word on whether Mr. Chait will have more than the usual difficulty in finding a replacement girlfriend, or whether "to chait on someone" will enter the language.

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