Fed up with waiting for JK Rowling to finish the much delayed next Harry Potter book,
some anonymous party in China has decided to take matters into their own
hand, by publishing an
alternative fifth Harry Potter book.
Written in Chinese and translating as
Harry Potter and Leopard Walk Up To Dragon, the book uses existing Harry Potter characters, though diverges wildly from Rowling's works, going in a somewhat more Tolkienesque direction; in it, the young wizard is transformed into a fat, hairy dwarf and stripped of his powers by a mysterious rain, and goes off to battle evil in the shape of a dragon.
The book begins with the lines: "Harry doesn't know how long it will take to wash the sticky cream cake off his face. For a civilised young man it is disgusting to have dirt on any part of his body. He lies in the high-quality china bathtub, keeps wiping his face, and thinks about Dali's face, which is as fat as the bottom of Aunt Penny."
I wonder whether this will show up in English. Maybe I should start checking certain bookshops for it...
Don't hold your breath....