The Null Device

Greenpeace Guide to Environmentally Safe Sex

Greenpeace have released a guide to environmentally safe sex, for highly principled people, with advice such as "if you like to use produce to get the blood boiling, make sure it is GE-free", and making sure that paddles are made from sustainably-harvested timber; not to mention suggestions for role-playing S&M games such as "George Bush and Corporate America at the Earth Summit":
6. Have you got something more than a good time up your sleeve. Could it be polyvinyl chloride? Ditch the PVC and vinyl accessories for your playtime. The production of PVC creates and releases one of the most toxic chemicals - dioxin. You also don't want to be sucking on that stuff. The use of PVC in young children's toys has already been banned in many countries. Instead, opt for accessories made from natural substances like rubber or leather.

Not sure what animal-liberation groups will think of Greenpeace telling people to use leather instead of PVC. How about sex toys made from hemp and recycled tyres?

There are 3 comments on "Greenpeace Guide to Environmentally Safe Sex":

Posted by: alex Fri Sep 20 17:36:05 2002

greenpeace can eat me. i'm sick of their 'give us $30 a month for the rest of your life' clipboard vultures in the city; according to the recent book 'you are being lied to' they're not as clean as they want to portray themselves. the notion of them dictating how people behave behind closed doors is on a par with the vatican doing the same thing. fuck the planet and fuck them too, pun intended.

Posted by: Zed Sun Sep 22 20:30:43 2002

since you asked...

Posted by: Ben http:// Wed Sep 25 06:11:40 2002

Everyone knows Greenpeace is a CIA front designed to harass the French and Soviet nuclear industries.

Hemp dildoes: I love the idea! You grow them, I'll market them. Just don't tell Senator Alston.