psychoceramics: Patent absurdities

["Andrew C. Bulhak" <acb @ yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au>]

Not quite the free-energy/perpetual-motion/time-travel patents sometimes
claimed to be held by various crackpots, but somewhat absurd nonetheless.

Btw, if you, dear reader, got access to the patent database search
engine (I don't think it's on the Web, but I could be wrong), what 
keywords would you search on in the hope of finding kooky patents?
I'd wager that "[a]ether" might bring up a few...

----- Forwarded message from david mankins -----

To: silent-t--@w--.std.com
Subject: to infinity, and beyond!
Date: Fri, 16 Feb 1996 15:06:25 -0500
From: david mankins <dm @ k12-nis-2.bbn.com>



   > From: Keith Bostic <b--@b--.com>
   > ChrisT--@a--: Science Marches ON!                         14 Feb 1996 23:47
   
   An excerpt from a bit of email from a mate of mine who works for the
   patent office.
   
     Something I discovered while practicing on APS (the patent office
     computer word search system) during a refresher class today:
   
	US PATENT 5,058,833 -- ABSTRACT:
	  A spaceship is provided with a freely spinning propeller mounted
	on the front end.  The propeller significantly reduces resistance
	to flight and also deflects space particles which might otherwise
	slow the craft.  The sides of the spacecraft have ridges which are
	coated on the front side with radiation reflecting material and
	on the back side with radiation absorbing material.  The resultant
	force of radiations being absorbed from the rear and reflected from
	the front propels the craft forward.
   
     I pulled a copy of the patent after the class.  Suffice it to say that
     the main text makes the abstract look like a model of scientific rigor.
      

- david mankins (d--@b--.com, dm@world.std.com, phone(US): 617-873-2873)

----- End of forwarded message from david mankins -----

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